Thursday, May 26, 2011


If our intention was to expedite our departure from this place (this house, this town, this state, this...country?) we haven't been making much progress recently. One step forward, three back. Among the activities that are creating a diversion/distraction from making any big changes occur are fostering a dog in need from the rescue folks we usually deal with, and embarking on a nasty irrigation and landscape upgrade that has dragged on for weeks past the imagined completion date. That's Minnie the foster gal on the left - a nice girl soon to be spayed while in our care.

The irrigation and landscape ordeal has been the result of what we imagined was a well-thought-out strategic move that would allow us to get out and travel and explore without the burdens of hand-watering this high-maintenance property. In hindsight, we probably should have just bailed on the place and saved the considerable dollars and spared ourselves the horror of witnessing the massive destruction and lingering unfinished work as the weeks passed. I also didn't anticipate the many residual tasks that will rmain for me after the contractor circus leaves our property. I can only hope that the finished project with all the raw unhealed areas will add to rather than detract from any potential sale if we extricate ourselves from this place finally.

Of course, common wisdom would suggest that in order to leave here, we must have a destination where we might arrive. But ah, no, that would be too simple.



It seems our lovely country has a desperate lack of architects and builders capable of producing homes that are not hideous abominations, bedecked by acres of wall-to-wall carpet, shoddy materials, grotesque pseudo-spa bath suites, and vast swaths of water and labor wasting lawns. Adding to the inherent defects are usually years of eccentric occupancy by previous owners during which they may have applied nightmarish wallpaper and paint, embarked on all manner of ill-advised and poorly executed home 'improvements', and nursed the infrastructure into a state of imminent collapse such that the first year(s) of next-ownership is/are likely to involve a fleet of service vehicles lining up around the block as plumbers, roofers, appliance sellers/service, arborists, tile refurbishers, deck/window/door/fence contractors, painters, landscapers, electricians, and assorted handy-persons of varying competency and veracity draw you into expensive and stressful participation in what is known as The Service Economy. Order extra checks. Lower your standards of craftsmanship and reliability. Ponder the fiction that is the Joy of Home Ownership. I guess this is a long way of saying that we haven't identified a destination home to replace this one. Or town. Or state.

Loyal or long time readers here may recall that a shiny new life in Mexico was the inspiration for this blog in the first place. And that may still be the best path forward.

Pues, el diablo está en los detalles...

If we sell this place before we have a replacement, we need to first sell, donate, discard, or store every item we have accumulated over the decades. Or get a housemate/sitter/renter to look after things. Or simply button it up and leave it unoccupied for some period of time, then face the challenges of disposal later. For various reasons, none of these options seem very appealing. Common wisdom is that one should visit and rent for some period of time in Mexico before committing to a purchase. A fine idea for a kid closing out his dorm room following graduation, or a townhouse/apartment dweller on the move.

Not that we can't figure out something. As I opened with, the first order of business is perhaps to discontinue the introduction of distracting and resource-depleting activities. Concentrate on thinning out the posessions and making the house ready for sale.

I have several very low-level conflicts in play here, trying to decide a way forward. Among them, I value a simple, uncomplicated, quiet, peaceful, low stress life in pleasant surroundings. Being uprooted and shoved forward into unknown circumstances is not necessarily simple, uncomplicated, quiet, peaceful, or low stress. The new surroundings may or may not be pleasant. Of course, rumor has it that much of this is largely a matter of perception, and self-discipline.

I also crave something rewarding and meaningful to be engaged with. A renewed associated with aviation? The arts? Probably not information technology, as I am weary of all manner of techno-grandiosity. To continue with work means finding a place in the U.S. (that is not in Colorado) with a tolerable seasonal and social climate, factoring in things like crime, traffic, various other quality-of-life matters and cost of living. Then trying to pry my age-discriminated carcass into a workplace. Or sufficient belt-tightening to accept retirement and probably try to work as an artist with no goal of producing income.

In Mexico, conventional work is not an option. However, there is better/affordable/accessible health care, less hustle, and an abundance of cultural magic. Many regions offer a decent climate yet are afordable. While homes are often humble, they are not disgusting in the manner of much of the U.S. residential stock. I could resume my efforts there with oil painting, and consider it a job I suppose.

I've even imagined what life in an RV full time would be like, out of here, but taking time to see what presents itself, since no one arrangement seems to present a clearly superior or compelling opportunity.

Well, I started out just to post a status update, since it's been several weeks without anything new here, but ended up with an unfocused self-indulgent rant. It's been a frustrating couple of weeks. Stick with me - I'll try to do the same.




Wednesday, May 11, 2011


It's been a hard week here - the landscape guy started installing the lines for the sprinkler/irrigation system, and it was a more destructive and brutal process than I had imagined. I found myself feeling really stupid for ever thinking this project would be a good idea. In general, I have a firm belief that there is almost NO project that is a good idea. Projects are an example of my suspicion that 90% of what people find to occupy their time and spend (waste) their money on is of no value at all - the remaining 10% is mostly destructive to themselves and others, with just a tiny fraction proving to be worthy of their efforts.




The work outside was conceived of as a way for us to be freer to travel a little more often and for longer periods of time, without the worry that lawn and landscape would suffer from lack of hand-watering attention during the summer and fall months in this rather arid climate.

I do hope that as this landscape installation proceeds and wraps up that I will feel more optimistic about the outcome. However, in the meantime there are still small signs of beauty and wonder around the house if one looks, and it never hurts to fill the house with the smell of fresh-baked banana bread when the scent of despair is in the air...

Sunday, May 08, 2011


Well, it's been a long hard day, but it's still Mothers Day, and I want to get a few photos up to honor my Mom, and formalize my remembrance of her.

We were much alike in many ways, and while I have to deal with some inherited traits from my Dad as well, most of what I think Mom passed along has served me better. Flower and vegetable gardening, art, appreciation for vintage things, cooking, reading, love of animals - many of the areas that give meaning to my life and provide me with the means to serve others in various ways.

Mom took me to the library early and often. I remember her always having a wall full of books as I grew up, and a diverse collection of some intellectual substance. After I moved away from home, she gave me a copy of Joy of Cooking, which still serves me well, and remains the only cookbook on my kitchen counter.

Like everyone in our family, she wasn't very expressive with her feelings (expect perhaps exasperation). Her enjoyment of solitude is a characterstic I share and appreciate increasingly as the years pass.

I am sad that I didn't have more time with her. She passed at a younger age than I am now, a sobering thought in itself, and before I reached a level of experience with relationships that might have allowed me to share more with her emotionally in a way that I'm quite sure would have been very beneficial for both of us.

I could go on - who couldn't about their fondness and rich memories of their mother. For now though, I'll just offer her this brief tribute and keep her in my thoughts as this troubled day unwinds.




Thursday, April 21, 2011


About a week after I returned from Yucatan in March, an automated email I set up long ago for job opportunity summaries arrived in my inbox. This one linked to a description of the kind of job I started looking for five years ago, shortly after we arrived here from California the second time.

It was a network analyst position with the local school district. Decent salary and presumably substantial benefits (especially health insurance - and for both of us). Interesting work I am well qualified for.

But ah, I had already begun to consider myself early-retired, and now with a renewed interest in living in Yucatan, or elsewhere in Mexico - and a conviction that things are going rapidly and irreversibly to Hell in the good old Estados Unidos.


The idea of rejoining the work force is a little difficult for me to contemplate at this point. I'm convinced that a job that requires sitting in a cubicle most of the day is probably life-shortening, and the ten-hour days with commute wouldn't leave much time for exercise or healthy shopping and eating. The years are also slipping away, and it's hard to guage what this would do to any trial run in Mexico.

So I sent in a resume, application, and cover letter, thinking to myself that if they responded I would deal with the issue then. If they didn't - no worries. They did. I went in and had what I thought was a great interview. Came home and told Pat that it looked 90% like a done deal to me. They advised I would hear from them in a week and a half.

So then I had the (seemingly strong) possibility that they might actually offer me the job. This was causing me all sorts of anxiety. We've been moving down a path of pulling up stakes here one way or another. More money, stimulating work, decent health care on someone else's dime? Snazzy co-workers and some work status and social life? No more oil painting? Late night support calls? Winter commuting (complete with driveway shovelling in the dark)? No more dog fostering? No time to read? No more naps?

I found myself hoping they would find someone better (well, who seemed better to them), and wondering how I would respond if they offered me the job. It would be hard to turn down, but equally hard to accept.

Today I heard from them. When I saw the caller ID number, then heard the hiring manager's voice start the message, I got a big shot of adrenaline. "...Wanted to let you know that we did hire someone else for the network analyst position but we really appreciated meeting you and I appreciated your interest in the position..."

So there it is. Now things go in a different direction. I am spared the ultimate decision. Should I be relieved, or disappointed? I mean, I am certainly relieved about being spared the responsibility for making the decision, and I guess it's irrelevant how I feel about not working there, because it isn't happening.

Would have been nice to have more income to stash away, but on the other hand...



Tuesday, April 05, 2011

In the news today from our congress as they posture over budget issues, a report that a proposal has been made to replace Medicare as we know it with some sort of voucher system, pushing people into private health insurance. Sounds like a ValPak coupon for a discount at one of those nice outfits with the $20,000,0000 CEO's to take care of before anyone gets any benefits for their pathetic health issues.

I am grandfathered in I suppose, as it was mentioned that this new arrangement will only afflict those currently under the age of 55. Until I am eligible for Medicare, I have a high-deductible HSA policy, that pays nothing until several thousand dollars have left my pocket. If I feel the need to consult a doctor over some issue, I should plan on around a $175 tab. This does not encourage investigation at the first sign of trouble.

In Mexican towns, it is common to have a little annex next to the farmacia where a genuine M.D. can be consulted for a pittance. I posted the picture to the left on Facebook of one such clinic in Valladolid, Yucatan, with a 35 peso (about $3 US) fee, and a friend from a small town near Gudalajara commented that in HIS town, the fee is only 25 pesos (around $2 US). Of course, if one is confident about the nature of their health issue and its pharmacological resolution, most drugs are available without a prescription (and often at a fraction of the cost North of the border). Pharmacists will assist with selection.

If one desires a more thorough, specialized, or personalized physician visit, there is always a private appointment with a doctor available in his or her office for around $25 US. I have heard a number of times that this will involve a 30-45 minute visit with a genuinely interested practitioner, who will take time to learn about you, your history, and complaint. Perhaps others have shared my experience at a US medical office where one is herded around and processed for a good while, until finally a watch-checking doctor or PA breezes in to cram a few quick questions and half-hearted probing or glances into the alloted ten minutes.

If lab work is required or desired in Mexico, you may go to a facility for blood work, X-rays, etc, and simply ask for whatever you need or want at a modest cost (and without a doctor's order), then pick up the results for your return visit to the doctor. In the US system, it's not unusual to have a number of extremely expensive legal-department mandated tests ordered that would otherwise not be indicated. Mexico is not big on tort law.

Occasionally when I express my interest in relocation to Mexico, people here ask if I have concerns about medical care. I tell them if I don't get down there soon, with the ability to take advantage of the inexpensive and accessible care, I risk losing my health and perhaps my life due to the disgraceful horrifying system the non-wealthy and privately-insured are cursed with in the EE.UU.

Yarn or embroidery thread, Valladolid mercado.


Mother and daughter, Valladolid mercado.

Friday, April 01, 2011

I haven't been painting as much as I would like, always seeming to find an excuse in the other demands around the house - foster dogs, housekeeping, shopping, cooking, office work, gardening, etc. I also fear that I'll put a lot of work into a painting and screw it up - unable to finish it. Ha - so much like the rest of my life, not starting things for fear that failure will result...

There is an artists co-op in town that I belong to. I've shown my best and most recent work in their gallery a couple of times in the past. Tonight (Friday) was the opening of a new show I didn't submit any work for. A couple of reasons - the only pieces I have that weren't already shown before are what I consider my less accomplished (and mostly older) work, and I've developed an attitude that I don't care if anyone sees my art, and especially don't care if they like it. When I ignored the first notice from the co-op and reminder to get the work into the gallery for the show tonight, those were my thoughts. But today, I started to really regret not putting three paintings that have never left the house out there. The truth is, it does matter to me that someone at least see them. Liking is not as important. It seems a little like the old addage about a tree falling in the woods - if there is no one there to hear it...

So tonight, to console myself, I'm putting up the three not-my-best paintings here that I would/should have submitted for the show (in low-res un-color-corrected format). Maybe if they're seen, no matter how humble, they'll be art...


Arlene and Mitts


Wheatland Ranch - Moonrise Cows


Mona and Clark - Wheatland, Wyoming

My better work is mostly of Mexican street scenes. Since the recent Yucatan trip, I should have some decent new material to work from. As I consider leaving this area, with it's vibrant art scene, one of my regrets is that I didn't establish myself more as a mature artist. I'll try in the coming weeks to at least complete a few new pieces - if I succeed I'll post them here.